Question Summary: Sila Rahmi (Ties of Kinship) Question Detail:
1.What does Sila Rehmi means ? ( breaking which is severe sin ) Does it consists only those relatives which whom one cannot maary i.e Maharim.
2.And which which things come in category of Sila rehmi ? i know that it includes, to offer janaza, to attend marraige, to help them in dire conditions , take care of patients and visit them. But what else includes in Sila Rehmi ? How often should one visit them i.e frequency of visits / And does it also include to visit them , just to say Hi, Hello ?
3.And How would male person Do Sila Rehmi ? like If i visit my aunty, then there are her daughters (my cousins ) present there, and there arise issue of Parda then, so then what should i do ? and how should i do Sila rehmi to my aunty ? Similarly when i visit my grand mother, in their home my uncle's wives are also there, and they don't do Parda of face from me. So how should i do Sila Rehmi ?
Answer :
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh. Shariah has emphasised on maintaing family ties and warned against breaking family ties. Allāh Taala mentions in the Holy Quran, وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ الَّذِي تَسَاءَلُونَ بِهِ وَالْأَرْحَامَ “… and fear Allāh through whom you demand your mutual (rights), and (do not cut) family ties. نساء’ 4:1 وَآتِ ذَا الْقُرْبَى حَقَّهُ وَالْمِسْكِينَ “And give to the relative his due and to the miskeen (poor).” الإسراء17:26 Nabi صلي الله عليه وسلم has mentioned, «مَنْ أَحَبَّ أَنْ يُبْسَطَ لَهُ فِي رِزْقِهِ، وَيُنْسَأَ لَهُ فِي أَثَرِهِ، فَلْيَصِلْ رَحِمَهُ» "He who desires ample provisions and his life be prolonged, should maintain good ties with his blood relations".صحيح البخاري (8/ 5) "الرَّحِمُ مُعَلَّقَةٌ بِالْعَرْشِ تَقُولُ مَنْ وَصَلَنِي وَصَلَهُ اللهُ، وَمَنْ قَطَعَنِي قَطَعَهُ اللهُ" "The bond of relationship is suspending from the Throne, and says: 'He who keeps good relations with me, Allah will keep connection with him, but whosoever severs relations with me, Allah will sever connection with him". صحيح مسلم (4/ 1981) Conversely, severing the ties (qata-ur-rahim), is very high on the list of enormities., Allah Taala has cursed the one severing family ties. وَالَّذِينَ يَنْقُضُونَ عَهْدَ اللَّهِ مِنْ بَعْدِ مِيثَاقِهِ وَيَقْطَعُونَ مَا أَمَرَ اللَّهُ بِهِ أَنْ يُوصَلَ وَيُفْسِدُونَ فِي الْأَرْضِ أُولَئِكَ لَهُمُ اللَّعْنَةُ وَلَهُمْ سُوءُ الدَّارِ “And those who break the covenant of Allah, after its ratification, and sever that which Allah has commanded to be joined (i.e. they sever the bond of kinship and are not good to their relatives) and work mischief in the land, on them is the curse, and for them is the unhappy home (i.e. Hell)” [Ar-Rad 13:25] Maintaining family ties is to keep in touch and associate with family members in a way that nurses their feelings. This is understood from the following hadith, لَمَّا نَزَلَتْ هَذِهِ الْآيَةُ (وَأَنْذِرْ عَشِيرَتَكَ الْأَقْرَبِينَ) ، قَامَ النَّبِيُّ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَنَادَى: (يَا بَنِي كَعْبِ بْنِ لُؤي أَنْقِذُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ مِنَ النَّارِ. يَا بَنِي عَبْدِ مَنَافٍ أَنْقِذُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ مِنَ النَّارِ. يَا بَنِي هَاشِمٍ أَنْقِذُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ مِنَ النَّارِ. يَا بَنِي عَبْدِ الْمُطَّلِبِ أَنْقِذُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ مِنَ النَّارِ. يَا فَاطِمَةُ بِنْتَ مُحَمَّدٍ أَنْقِذِي نَفْسَكِ مِنَ النَّارِ. فَإِنِّي لَا أَمْلِكُ لكِ مِنَ اللَّهِ شَيْئًا غَيْرَ أَنَّ لكم رحماً سأبُلُّها بِبِلالِهَا) "When the following was revealed: 'And warn your tribe (O Muhammad) of near kindred,' the Messenger of Allah called the Quraish and they gathered, and he spoke in general and specific terms, then he said: 'O Banu Ka'b bin Lu'ayy! O Banu Murrah bin Ka'b! O Banu 'Abd Shams! O Banu 'Abd Manaf! O Banu Hisham! O Banu 'Abdul-Muttalib! Save yourselves from the Fire! O Fatimah! Save yourself from the Fire. I cannot avail you anything before Allah, but I will uphold the ties of kinship with you." صحيح مسلم (1/ 192) Examples of nursing feelings is to occasionally enquire about their wellbeing, if they are ill, visit them, attend family gatherings and assist them in their challenging moments. Female cousins are family and are also deserving of maintaining ties with them. In doing so, the laws of hijab does not have to be violated. It is possible to maintain family ties while observing the laws of hijab. And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best Huzaifah Deedat Student Darul Iftaa Lusaka, Zambia Checked and Approved by, Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
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