Question Summary:
Is Maji suppose to be considered as Napak?…Gusl for long hair:

Question Detail:

                 I am 27 year old married man(and my wife is 25). by Allah's grace we are happy couple. we want to live our married life Islamic, we have following queries.

1) Is Maji suppose to be considered as Napak?    I keep leaking Maji a lot and when    my pennis touches my wife she
   doesn't like my maji, she thinks   its a dirty thing and napak.
   
 a) Our question is if my maji   touches her should she feel bad about it?
 b) Is gusal wajib on her after my maji is touched to her and me also
 c) Is wuju wajib on her and me ( only after maji touch)

2) Gusl for long hair:
   we know that after inter course we   have to have  Gusl and one of the norm  of Gusl is that we have to wash our    head(skul) completely , each and every hair should get wet,     since my wife has long hair, she  finds it difficult, we heard from  somebody that even, masah( moving   wet fingers on skull) is also enough   in such case.    ( few times my wife dint repond, when i wanted to have intercourse,  just because she will have to take gusl )

Answer :

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh
1. Mazi is considered impure(napaak)
a) The emitting of mazi(pre coital fluid) prior to the ejaculation of mani(spermatic fluid) is a necessity when engaging in intercourse. Although it is impure, she should not feel bad about it since it is a necessary requirement for intercourse to take place.
b) The fard ghusal is not compulsory on both of you; however it is necessary to wash the areas upon which the mazi has reached.
) قَوْلُهُ : لَا عِنْدَ مَذْيٍ ) أَيْ لَا يُفْرَضُ الْغُسْلُ عِنْدَ خُرُوجِ مَذْيٍ
(Raddul Muhtaar Vol. 1. Pg. 152 H M Saeed)
c) Your wudhu will break with the emitting of mazi, and it will be necessary that you wash mazi off from whichever area it reached too on your body.
. )لَا ) عِنْدَ ( مَذْيٍ أَوْ وَدْيٍ ) بَلْ الْوُضُوءُ مِنْهُ وَمِنْ الْبَوْلِ جَمِيعًا عَلَى الظَّاهِرِ
(Raddul Muhtaar Vol.1. Pg. 152)
The wudhu of your wife will not break, but it will be necessary for her to wash the places on her body where the mazi had touched.
2. If your wife`s hair is plaited then it is not necessary for her to open the plaits and wash all the hair. It will suffice her to make the water reach to the roots of the hair. However if her hair is not plaited then it will be necessary that water reaches all the hair on her head no matter how long the hair is .
    أَنَّ { أُمَّ يَ اللَّهُ عَنْهَا سَأَلَتْ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَقَالَتْ : إنِّي أَشُدُّ ضَفْرَ رَأْسِي أَفَأَنْقُضُهُ إذَا اغْتَسَلْت فَقَالَ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أسَلَمَةَ رَضَِفِيضِي الْمَاءَ عَلَى رَأْسِك ، وَسَائِرِ جَسَدِك ، وَيَكْفِيك إذَا بَلَغَ الْمَاءُ أُصُولَ شَعْرِك } ، وَلِأَنَّ ضَفِيرَتَهَا إذَا كَانَتْ مَشْدُودَةً فَتَكْلِيفُهَا نَقْضُهَا يُؤَدِّي إلَى الْحَرَجِ ، وَلَا حَرَجَ حَالَ كَوْنِهَا مَنْقُوضَةٌ ، وَالْحَدِيثُ مَحْمُولٌ عَلَى هَذِهِ الْحَالَةِ
 (Badaai us Sanaai Vol.1. Pg.118 Darul Kutub Deoband)
And Allah knows best
Wassalam
Ml. Abdul Hameed,
Student Darul Iftaa
Checked and Approved by:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In'aamiyyah