Question Summary:
Parents are not getting us married

Question Detail:

Salam ,

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

At the outset, one should understand that it is not permissible to unnecessarily talk/chat to a Non-Mahram. It is strictly forbidden to date and enter into an illicit relationship.

Allah Taalah says in the Quraan:

وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنَا إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَاءَ سَبِيلًا

Translation: “And do not even go close to adultery. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and it is an evil way.”

(Surah Al-Israa, Aayah 32)

Consider the following Hadeeth:

أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏ "‏ لاَ يَزْنِي الزَّانِي حِينَ يَزْنِي وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ وَلاَ يَسْرِقُ حِينَ يَسْرِقُ وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ وَلاَ يَشْرَبُ الْخَمْرَ حِينَ يَشْرَبُهَا وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ وَالتَّوْبَةُ مَعْرُوضَةٌ بَعْدُ ‏

Translation: A fornicator who fornicates is not a believer as long as he commits fornication, and no one who steals is a believer as long as he commits theft, and no one who drinks wine is a believer as long as he drinks it, and repentance may be accepted after that.

(Saheeh Al-Muslim, Kitaab Al-Imaan)

If a man and woman sex chat, they do not have to get married because of sex chatting. They should stop sex chatting. If they wish to genuinely get married then they should understand that marriage is an extremely important step and a lifelong responsibility. It is a lifetime commitment in which a long-term relationship is established as a family. A marriage is a means of bringing comfort and joy to both spouses and raising righteous Muslim children. In choosing a spouse, all related issues must be carefully contemplated. When one is choosing a spouse, he is choosing a companion for the rest of his life. Hence, it is of utmost importance than one makes a constructive decision, deliberates every avenue and thinks for the long term. A pious spouse will be a source of contentment and preservation of one’s Deen.

We are living in this world of means. When searching for anything, one adopts appropriate means to acquire it. Marriage is one of the most important aspects of one’s life.

If the boy and girl in reference wish to get married, they should discuss the issue with some responsible person in the family, perhaps an elderly reputable person to communicate and influence both parents to get them married.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Muhammad I.V Patel

Student Darul Iftaa
Lusaka, Zambia

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.