Question Summary:
My husband refers to divorce as “that.” He said it multiple times, does that count as divorce?

Question Detail:

Please help. I suffer from whispers. If my husband jokes with me saying if it is so hot here then go to your parents house i start having whispers that did he or did he not mean divorce. I keep asking him then that did you mean "That"? he always says no i did not mean "That". He knows i suffer from doubts and whispers and is always helpful in calming me down. We never use the word divorce and use "That" instaed.
He knows i use the word "That" instead of divorce. one day again at something random he said, i started havinf whipsers and i asked him you did not mean "That" right? He said to tease me yes i meant " That". this happend three times on different occasions that he said yes i meant " That" just to tease me. He did not intend divorce at all. Does he saying yes i meant "That" just to tease me count as divorce? please answer me i am always worried about these things. May Allah reward you

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Divorce is a very serious issue and your husband should be careful in his use of words. It's not something to be used to tease the wife because the husband can inadvertently divorce his wife even if he is joking.
However, you have not written what your husband said to you on those three occasions to which you responded: “You did you not mean 'that' right?” and he responded that “Yes, I meant 'that'.”
We need to know what your husband stated exactly in order to issue a proper ruling.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Sohail ibn Arif,
Student Darul Iftaa
Chicago, USA
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.