Question Summary: Marital related issues Question Detail:
I am really upset ever since I gave bad dua to one of my friends. I really respect him and care for him and he cares for me too. One day we had a fight and I said to him a bad dua. I never ever wish to say that to him or anyone else. I repent to Allah and wish that Allah does not answer my bad dua. Really I want a good life for him. Help me
This same guy loves me and I love him too but due to some frustration he said in anger I swear to Allah I won’t marry you so is it permissible for us to marry now. Another guy wants to marry me since 4 years, he even send proposal to my parents but they reject it, now again he is forcing me to talk to my parents but I love someone else. He is saying he will do some amal on my parents and my parents will agree for our marriage. Is this all correct? Doing Amal and making parents agree. And let me know some Qurānic dua as I am not feeling well for the past 2 months.
Answer :
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. As-salāmu ῾alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh. We understand that by “friend” you are referring to your boyfriend. Shar῾īah has clearly distinguished between Mahram (Unmarriageable kin) and Non-Mahram (Marriageable kin). Segregation (Pardah) is necessary with Non-Mahrams. You should refrain from interacting with the boy or any other male who is your Ghair-Mahram. This is a major sin and incurs the wrath of Allah. Cursing the boy in reference and breaking the relationship will help you stay away from him and committing sin. Allah Ta’ala says, وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنَا إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَاءَ سَبِيلًا “Do not come near to adultery for it is a shameful (deed) and an evil, opening the road (to other evils)” (Qurān 17:32) Apart from adultery (Zina) being a sin, staying away from it is a means of protecting ourselves from vice and evil. Regarding your second query, the oath is valid and binding. If the marriage materializes, the oath will terminate. The boy will have to give expiation (Kaffārah) for violating the oath. Expiation for violating an oath is to: 1. Free a slave (not applicable in these times), or 2. Feed ten poor people an average two meals, or 3. Provide clothing for ten poor people. If one cannot do any of the aforementioned three for a valid reason then he may fast for three consecutive days. In relation to your third query, you should inform your parents about his appalling actions; they should speak to his parents and resolve the issue. Meanwhile, you should read the Mu῾awaztain, i.e., Surah Falaq and Surah Nās (the last two Surahs of the 30th chapter) as it safeguards a person from magic and calamities. عَنْ عَائِشَةَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهَا:أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ كَانَ إِذَا اشْتَكَى يَقْرَأُ عَلَى نَفْسِهِ بِالْمُعَوِّذَاتِ وَيَنْفُثُ، فَلَمَّا اشْتَدَّ وَجَعُهُ كُنْتُ أَقْرَأُ عَلَيْهِ وَأَمْسَحُ بِيَدِهِ رَجَاءَ بَرَكَتِهَا It is narrated on the authority of Hazrat Aī῾sha Radhi Allahu Anha: whenever Rasulullah Sallallāhu Alayhi Wasallam suffered from an ailment, he would recite the Mu῾awaztain, blow over his hands and then wiped his whole body with those hands. When his pain became acute, I would recite the Mu῾awaztain blow over his hands and then he would wipe them over himself, because my hands could not be the fitting substitute for his blessed hands. And Allah Ta῾āla Knows Best Mufti Zaid M Shelia,
Student Darul Iftaa
Chicago, Illinois (USA)
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
www.daruliftaa.net
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