Question Summary:
i am 46,i cam to usa in 1990, i am ashamed of my self,in the early 90’s i commited zinah many times,i repented, i married an american christian woman in 1994,

Question Detail:

i am 46,i cam to usa in 1990, i am ashamed of my self,in the early 90's i commited zinah many times,i repented, i married an american christian woman in 1994,
 
6 months later i found out she gave me an std [ sexually tranmitted disease called herpes], this disease is caused by a virus which cause blisters or bumps on the man or woman sex parts and it is gone in a few days, it repeats every few moths for the first few years then repeats yealry after and very likely fade away even though an infected person will still carry the virus,it is transmitted when a sex partner have an open skin outbreak [ bumps or blisters ] and skin on skin contact,but can less likley be transmitted just before an open outbreak is on the skin surface,
 
i asked some muslim doctors and they told me i don't have to tell a future wife that i have it since it is not a serious diease,it does not affect our life,it is like a cold ,comes and goes,question is,am i allowed to marry a muslim woman since i commited zinah many years ago even though i have repented to allah and if i am do i have to tell my futre wife that i have it knowing that it may be very hard for me to find one since it will scare off woman from marrying me even though in science this diease is not bad at all and millions of people have it world wide and they all live their life normally,thank u

Answer :

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In the name of Allāh, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Assalāmu ῾alaykum wa Rahmatullāhi Wabarakātuh
 
Hazrat Saeed bin Jubair (Radiyallahu Anhu) reports from Ibn Abbaas (Radiyallahu Anhuma) that there were some people who had killed a number of people unjustly and had committed a lot of shameful acts. They came to Nabi (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallalm) and submitted to him, “The religion you invite us to, is no doubt very good, but we have a problem. We are continuously reminded about all those sins we have already committed.  If we become Muslims, is there hope that our repentance will be accepted. Thereupon Allah Ta’ala revealed the following verse:-
Say (on My behalf), ―O servants of Mine who have acted recklessly against their own selves, do not despair of Allah‘s mercy. Surely, Allah will forgive all sins. Surely, He is the One who is the Most-Forgiving, the Very-Merciful. [39:53]
The outcome of this verse comes to be that, well before death arrives, the repentance made from sins, no matter how serious, even from kufr-(disbelief) and shirk-(ascribing of partners) to Allah Ta’ala is readily accepted.
(Ma’ariful Qur’an, Pg. 574)
In another verse Allah Ta’ala makes mention of a simple solution, yet dynamic in its outcome i.e.
إِنَّ الْحَسَنَاتِ يُذْهِبْنَ السَّيِّئَاتِ ذَلِكَ ذِكْرَى لِلذَّاكِرِينَ
 Surely, good deeds erase bad deeds. That is a reminder for the mindful. [11:114]
 
 
Another aspect to consider about forgiveness is that doing good deeds such as giving your time and money to charity, is a way for Allah Ta’ala to automatically blot out your minor sins without you even asking for forgiveness from such sins.

Hazrat Abu Bakr (Radiyallahu Anhu) reports that Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said: “if a Muslim regrettably falls into some sin, he should make wudhu and offer two raka’ats of nafl salaah, then that sin will be forgiven. This is known as salaatul taubah. (Prayer of repentance)
 (Musnad Ahmad & Ibn Kathir)
 
The act of fornication is a major sin. In order for major sins to be expiated and forgiven, sincere repentance is a condition. Firstly, you need to recognize that what you have done is wrong. Secondly, you need to be remorseful of the action. Thirdly, you need to acquire a firm determination that you will sincerely try hard never to do the act again, and finally, you need to beseech Allah Ta’ala for forgiveness.
 
The religion of Islam is complete, comprehensive, unique and indeed beautiful. If one errs then hope is just around the corner. We should not lose hope so easily, however, this does not mean that we go around enjoying and indulging in haraam and when we feel like, make taubah and continue as though nothing has happened. This is all a test from Allah Ta’ala and to be successful in these tests, we need to bring our lives onto the straight path
 
Neverthelesss, you have consulted a medical practitioner and sought advice concerning your sexually transmitted disease. We concur with his advice from a medical point of view as well as from the side of Shariah. Alhamdulillah, you mentioned how ashamed and shameful you feel and at the same time you are seeking medical help. Continue in this manner and do not expose your past as this is the duty of Allah Ta’ala and not ours as human beings.
 
And Allāh Ta῾āla Knows Best
Wassalāmu ῾alaykum 
 
Ml. Ebrahim bin Khaliel Ahmed Desai,
Student Dārul Iftā
 
Checked and Approved by:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Dārul Iftā, Madrasah In῾āmiyyah