Question Summary:
illness and difficulties in life

Question Detail:

 
I was once quite religious however few years I lost faith, I did not abide by any of the islamic pillars, I did not avoide that which is forbidden such as food, contact with women etc.
My biggest sin I believe is homosexuality.  I fell in to a deep spiral. However a year ago I was travelling and I prayed Jumma at Al-Aqsa mosque and I asked for guidance which I believe Allah has answered.
I experienced significant hardship to do with worldy pursuits such as losing my job, not being able to live on my own I have even become in trouble with the law. This is ongoing and may lead to prison.
However, since all of this started I moved home to my islamic family and have found my Deen again. I sincerely believe everything I am experiencing is for the best. I understand I have to denouce my sinful ways. I understand forgiveness will not be easy.
My two questions are:
1. I feel as if I am developing a serious illness. If I believe this and do not seek medical attention and this illness leads to my death, is that Haram?
 
2. What reccommendations do you have to prepare myself in case this is a terminal illness and I only have short period of time left? (Prayers etc).

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
 We are pleased to hear that you are concerned about your Deen. You have acknowledged that you done wrong in the past. Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala loves those who sincerely repent to him after committing sins. The most difficult part is to acknowledge that you have done something wrong. You have already admitted your wrong.
No matter how much of a sinner a person might be, Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala always forgives a person on condition that a person sincerely repents to Allah. He is the most Merciful, the most Forgiving.
The worldly life is a test. The Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam has mentioned:
الدُّنْيَا سِجْنُ الْمُؤْمِنِ، وَجَنَّةُ الْكَافِرِ
“The world is a prison for the believers and paradise for the non-believers.” [1]
 
When Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala puts a person through difficulties, it is to test his Iman or to make him reflect. Islamic history is full of incidents of Prophets, Sahabah and the pious people whom Allah put through trials and tribulations.
However, if you truly feel that you are going through a serious illness, you should seek medical assistance. Nevertheless, life and death is in the hands of Allah. If you happen to die without seeking medical assistance, you will not be sinful. In every case, a person should prepare for his death as death comes to a person unexpectedly.
 
Here under are few things that you may do which will invoke the mercy of Allah:

 
We pray for you that Allah make it easy for you to practice upon his Deen. Ameen!
 
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Abdul Hannan Nizami,
Student Darul Iftaa
Chicago, USA
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.