Question Summary:
How do I change and inculcate good manners in me?

Question Detail:

I really want to change and be a better Muslimah, but everytime i commit a sin, i feel Allaah will not accept me and i go on with doing wrong. I try to change for the better but it only lasts for few days,and when i feel low esteem i dont do any ibadah i get lazy. please tell me what is islaic ruling and advise for this?

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
As-salāmu ʿalaykum wa-raḥmatullāhi wa-barakātuh
A Muʾmin (believer) is sometimes tested by Allah through prosperity and fortune to see if he shows gratitude to Allah Taʿālā in such conditions by worshipping him. Sometimes, a Muʾmin is tested with poverty or a calamity to see whether he will display Ṣabr (patience) in such conditions and continue to worship Him. Allah Taʿālā says:
{وَبَلَوْنَاهُمْ بِالْحَسَنَاتِ وَالسَّيِّئَاتِ لَعَلَّهُمْ يَرْجِعُونَ} [الأعراف: 168]
We test them with fortune and misfortune so that they may return (in repentance) to us.
There is nothing more effective than Ṣalāh to discipline oneself to remain firm in the worship of Allah Taʿālā in both these conditions. Ṣalāh protects a person from indecency and evil. It is only those who are firm on their Ṣalāh that find it easy to obey Allah Taʿālā in conditions of ease or difficulty. You should therefore become punctual with your Ṣalāh in times of ease, and you will not find it difficult to remain firm in times of difficulty.
Use the times of difficulty as an opportunity to turn to Allah Taʿālā in supplication and draw closer to Him. In times of sorrow and calamity, take solace in the fact that Ambiyā ʿAlaihimus Salām were put to the most difficult trials. In such conditions they did not forget Allah Taʿālā.
To inculcate good manners, read a book on the way of life of Nabi Ṣallallāhu ʿalaihi wa Sallam. Read a small portion everyday and try to bring the qualities of Nabi Ṣallallāhu ʿalaihi wa Sallam in your life. Nabi Ṣallallāhu ʿalaihi wa Sallam had the highest standard of character and morals. You should therefore try your utmost to emulate him in every facet of your life.
Lastly, make constant Dua for a change to come into your life. Make Dua from the recesses of your heart, humbly begging Allah Taʿālā to show you the correct path and adorn you with an upright character. The ability to do good and refrain from evil lies only in the power of Allah Taʿālā.
And Allah Taʿālā Knows Best
 
Checked and Approved by
Mufti Ebrahim Desai