Question Summary:
Forceful marriage

Question Detail:

 
I have a question regarding marriage.
My question is that I dont want to marry my dads propsal as I want to marry another sister, I have had a chat with my dad and they showed their anger at me and now I dont know what to do, I really want to marry someone of my choice and ofcourse the problem is my parents dont like their family and also the girl but im pretty sure if we marry eachother we can concentrate on deen more. 
Please advice me, but ive been searching and it states that parents can only advice you on who to marry but cant force you and I believe they are forcing me to marry their choice.

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
 
It has become a common misconception amongst the youth of this era that marriage is merely the bonding of two individuals and that it elicits no implications on the lives of anybody else. This attitude is due to the negative influence of western media and the decline of proper family values. Marriage, in essence, is the bonding and joining of two different families.
The key to a successful marriage is cooperation from all angles. So consider that your dad wished well for you and his choice for your marriage is based on his love and hope of happiness for you. If you do not desire to marry your dad’s proposal, approach him in a most respectful and dignifying way and explain to him your disdain for his proposal. Express your thoughts to him without uttering a single word of disrespect. You may make dua to Allah before approaching him to soften his heart. You should also make istikhaarah and ask Allah to guide you. Although you cannot be forced to marry an individual you do not wish to marry, it will be detrimental for you in the long run if you decide to marry someone whom your parents disapprove of. You should try and come to a mutual understanding with your parents via kindness and love. You may request an elder person of your family to intervene on your behalf to speak to your dad. Inshallah, any problem can be solved diplomatically with love and respect.     
 
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Muhammad Haris Siddiqui
Student Darul Iftaa
Melbourne, Australia 
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.