Question Summary:
Should i consider myself divorced in this case?

Question Detail:

my question is in reqard to divorce..... after an argument my husband said to me that in my full senses i divorce u and u should consider yourself to be divorce, call your parents up and arrange for your tickets.next morning when i enquired about breakfast he responded by saying, " did u not understand what i said to u yesterday?...i have divorced u and call your parents and leave. Whenhe came back home he again said to me ... give me your parents and grandparents address so i can mail them the talaaq papers.
After all this when his mother calls to talk to me .... i told her about the divorce...she then calls him up.... and he says what have u told my mom .....  i fepeated the very same thing written above which he confirmed but said i have given u one divorce....... as in shariah law triple talaq cannot be given ... there has to be  a waiting period of one month before each....and i have given u one talaq to reconsider what u said to me and apologise for your behaviour, but i said u said talaq three times and also told me to leave ....he says no and he wants me to leave and think things over at my parents home.pls adviceas to how many divorces have taken place .... and where my iddah has to be spend ....as i donot have any relatives here.

Answer :

In the Name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
We have observed the following three statements:
1. “after an argument my husband said to me that in my full senses i divorce u and u should consider yourself to be divorce”
2.  “next morning when i enquired about breakfast he responded by saying, " did u not understand what i said to u yesterday?...i have divorced u and call your parents and leave.”
3. “Whenhe came back home he again said to me ... give me your parents and grandparents address so i can mail them the talaaq papers.” 
The first statement constitutes one talāq raj‘ie (revocable divorce). The second and third statement did not constitute a divorce as your husband merely informed you regarding the one talāq given before. He did not issue a new talāq.
As such, once the husband issues a talāq raj‘ie, the wife becomes divorced and she has to sit in ‘iddah (waiting period) for three menstrual cycles if she experiences menses, or three months if she does not experience menses or child birth if she has conceived.
If the husband wishes to take her back, he may do so during the ‘iddah period. The husband may take her back verbally, for example he says to her “I take you back” etc., or by being intimate with her.^[1]
If the husband does not take her back as explained above during the ‘iddah period, the divorce becomes an irrevocable divorce.^[2] Therefore, if he wishes to take her back (after the ‘iddah period has finished), he may do so after renewing the nikāh.^[3]
Furthermore, the ‘iddah must be spent at the marriage home for the complete duration of her ‘iddah, without leaving the house, except for dire necessity.[4] Therefore, it is not necessary to spend the ‘iddah elsewhere.
Perhaps your husband was misinformed regarding the laws of talāq and its major implications. It is not necessary to wait for a duration of one month in order for three talāqs to transpire as there is no such restriction. Three talāqs can be issued unrestricted verbally and scripturally as the case with one talāq.
If your husband wishes to reconcile with you then he should make raj‘ah, i.e. he may take you back verbally or by being intimate.
 
 
And Allah Ta‘āla Knows Best
Fahad Abdul Wahab
Student Darul Iftaa
USA
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai                                                                                                                                                                                                                
www.Daruliftaa.net