Question Summary:
Problems with wife working as an Alimah and girls boarding in Madrasas.

Question Detail:

my wife is an aalima and wants to work as a teacher in a school or madresa teacher, she has a baby and will more in future (maybe next year). from what I know women should not be able to work as then it leads to lack of upbringing of children and taking care of house, and also opens many doors of fitna to others and her her self. what is your opinion?
also wanted to ask, my wife also went to boarding school darul loom, before i got married many people warned me about boarding darul loom girls, but  i thought it was nonsense. after i got married i realised they are more difficult to handle than normal girls in hte sense they are more manly inside as they have more hard hearts and very strong emotionally but also arrogant at the same time like they have been living in kuku land. lack of respect, normal home traditions, being a good wife, being helpful are not within her because she didnt spent time at her house. now I strongly beleive from talking to other ulama that it is against the sunnah and it is not found anywhere in the seerah of sahabah for boarding girls islamic school, same is the opnion of molana saad from pakistan markaz who is well known in tabligue. I think big ulama/organisations like you can stop this as I know marriages of aalimas breaking up more than normal girls.

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Islam provides guidelines for men and women in all walks of life and both have been given different roles to fulfil due to their natural temperaments.. The injunctions of Islam as decreed by Allah Ta’ala are designed according to gender differences.
In principal, a woman’s place is at home. This position is clearly entrenched in the Quran.
 Allah Ta’ala says,
 وقَرْنَ فِي بُيُوتِكُنَّ ِ
Translation: Remain (women) in your homes. (Al-Ahzaab: 33)
Accordingly, a woman should prioritize her life according to the above mentioned principle.
While being an Aalimah, and spreading the knowledge of Islam by teaching in a Madrasa is indeed a great act of virtue, the proper upbringing of one’s children and taking care of the home is of greater importance and should not be compromised. In principle, if the husband prohibits his wife from teaching because he feels it will open doors of Fitnah, or will lead to a lack of upbringing in the children, then the wife must obey her husband[1].
Our advice is you and your wife should discuss the situation. Identify the problems and the possible solutions for them. Proper communication is imperative for any partnership to nourish and most issues are resolved by discussing them properly. It may be best if such a solution can be devised, where the wife can teach for just a short period, thereby also enabling her to properly attend to her domestic duties.  
As far as your second query on the negative impact boarding in Madrasas has on the girls, we do acknowledge that such problems exists. The question must be asked, whether girls staying in boarding in Madrasas will bring quality and Imaan in the life of the girl or the opposite… Obviously, anything that is detrimental to the Akhlaq and Imaan of a person should be avoided.   
 However, one cannot blame and condemn the boarding in girls Madrasas in itself, but rather those situations where the students are ill-mannered and adequate attention is not paid to their tarbiat and akhlaq.
Moreover, in many situations problems occur where the objective is a good, but due to certain factors unsuitable results are seen. For example in boys Madrasas, the goal is for students to become closer to Allah and learn better Akhlaq, whereas in some situations the boy develops inappropriate qualities. This can also be seen in the various fields of Deen, such as Tabligh, where along with good and positive results, there are may be negative and shortcomings also.
This can also be seen in universities and collages where the goal is to educate the students and make them into better people. However, many a time students develop adverse qualities as a result of attending such institutes.
Hence, because of the negative outcome in some situations, one cannot deem the entire system of boarding in girls Madrasas as incorrect, as there are many positive benefits. These institutes have had an important role in the spreading of ‘Ilm amongst the women There is even a great need for such Madrasas in many parts of the world. Our focus and efforts should be to rectify the problematic aspects and the enhancement of the Akhlaq and Tarbiat of the girls.
 
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Arshad Ali
Student Darul Iftaa
Trinidad
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
http://www.daruliftaa.net/
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