Question Summary:
My wife practices on deen but has other habits I do not like

Question Detail:

I got  married 10 months ago.My wife does Salah, parda & telawat. But sometimes she speaks such a way that hurts me.Sometimes she talks bad about my parents.Sometimes she keeps home dirty that hurts me.As she is a obese girl, so i fall in waswasa that other men are happy with thin wives.
please advise me what should I do?

Answer :

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Brother-in-Islam,
Marriage is a union between two people based on love, kindness, and mutual understanding. As such, it is important for the husband and wife to understand the nature and qualities of one another. A successful marriage revolves around forming harmony with one another by being considerate of the good qualities and the short comings of the other. If there is a certain habit or quality of your wife that displeases you, then it is important for you to sit down with your wife and kindly discuss the matter while showing her utmost love and affection. Encourage her to be mindful of such things and let her know how you feel about such matters. 
Nevertheless, it is important to understand that Islam places a great importance on seeking a pious woman who obeys the commands of Ta'ālā and is steadfast in her deen. Allah Ta'ālā says in the Holy Quran:
فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللَّهُ 
The righteous women are (the ones who are) dutiful, guarding in the absence (of the husband) with the protection given by Allah. [Al-Qur`an, Surah An-Nisā, 34]
The Holy Prophet (sallallahu alihi wa sallam) has also stated in a hadith:
«تُنْكَحُ المَرْأَةُ لِأَرْبَعٍ: لِمَالِهَا وَلِحَسَبِهَا وَجَمَالِهَا وَلِدِينِهَا، فَاظْفَرْ بِذَاتِ الدِّينِ، تَرِبَتْ يَدَاكَ»
"A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be in loss." [Sahih al-Bukhari, 5090, The Book of Nikaah]
By the grace of Allah Ta'ālā, you have been fortunate to find a woman who possesses such qualities. The Holy Prophet (salalllahu alaihi wa sallam) said:
«الدُّنْيَا مَتَاعٌ، وَخَيْرُ مَتَاعِ الدُّنْيَا الْمَرْأَةُ الصَّالِحَةُ»
"The whole world is a provision, and the best provision of this world is a pious woman." [Sahih Muslim, 715, Chapter regarding the best provision of this world is a righteous woman ]
Allah Ta'ālā has granted you one of the best gifts in this world by bestowing you with a wife who is conscious of her deen. Therefore, you should make an effort to overlook certain shortcomings in her and focus on the qualities that make her stand out amongst the rest. Remember, every person has shortcomings . You will never ever come across any woman that is perfect. Rasulallah (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) advised:
«اسْتَوْصُوا بِالنِّسَاءِ، فَإِنَّ المَرْأَةَ خُلِقَتْ مِنْ ضِلَعٍ، وَإِنَّ أَعْوَجَ شَيْءٍ فِي الضِّلَعِ أَعْلاَهُ، فَإِنْ ذَهَبْتَ تُقِيمُهُ كَسَرْتَهُ، وَإِنْ تَرَكْتَهُ لَمْ يَزَلْ أَعْوَجَ، فَاسْتَوْصُوا بِالنِّسَاءِ»
"Treat women nicely, for a women is created from a rib, and the most curved portion of the rib is its upper portion, so, if you should try to straighten it, it will break, but if you leave it as it is, it will remain crooked. So treat women nicely." [Sahih al-Bukhari, 3331, Chapter regarding the creation of Adam and his offspring]
 
You should also remember, you are also a human being and like other general human beings, you too have shortcomings which your wife may be observing. She must have seen and observed many men whose outer appearance and conduct may outclass you, yet she chose to marry you and be with you. If she tolerates you, you too should tolerate and overlook her.
In marriage, time increases the love and bond between the spouses. In the beginning of the marriage, tolerance and patience yield great benefits and lay the foundation for a solid and firm marriage.
May Allah Ta'ālā grant you both a life full of love and happiness. Āmeen.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Bilal Mohammad
Student Darul Iftaa
USA
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
www.daruliftaa.net