Question Summary:
I have a friend who has a strange problem and he is ashamed so he is not asking directly to you. He is around 28 years old and he has developed a….He is very upset and now his parents wants him get married and so he doesnot know what to do.

Question Detail:

I have a friend who has a strange problem and he is ashamed so he is not asking directly to you. He is around 28 years old and he has developed a bed wetting problem for some years now and the problem is not geting away but getting worse. He says it happens either when there is pressure on the bladder or when he has some wet dreams regarding beautiful girls. Another problem he has is whenever he talks to good looking girls or continuously look at them, he again has leak droplets on his clothes. He is very upset and now his parents wants him get married and so he doesnot know what to do. He is scared that it may further aggravagate the problem and whether as a muslim he is supposed to tell his fiance of this problem and becuase of this problem is he eligible to get married. I know him since his childhood and he is not a bad character fellow. According to him, he talks to girls only for work related issues at the job.  

Answer :

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh
We are not clear as to what is the actual problem and what is meant by bed-wetting.
Generally, bed-wetting is referred to as wetting the bed through urine which is due to a weak bladder. If that is the problem, your friend should refer to a specialist for medication and cure.
However, it appears from the details of the query that the emission experienced by your friends is mazi and mani. When a person becomes physically matured (baligh) he experiences the emission of these two types of fluids from his private parts. When one has an erection, the gradual emission of fluid is called mazi. This is natural and not a sickness. However, this natural sensation must not be aggravated by looking at girls etc. Mazi is impure and if it soils the undergarments, the undergarments will become impure. Mazi invalidates wuzu.
Generally, a wet dream is when one has ejaculated mani (sperms) in ones sleep. This is also a natural but it is also due to one aggravating this natural sensation by polluting the mind with evil, for example, seeing girls, or reading or seeing inappropriate material etc. Mani is impure and also makes the soiled portion of the clothes impure. Mani invalidates the ghusal.

And Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Wasalam

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In'aamiyyah